Carine Fabius

Love Is…

I know Valentine’s Day is yesterday’s news — we’re past chocolate-covered hearts and onto chocolate-coated Easter eggzz and baby chixx. Wait, what am I thinking? Our next national holiday is the Oscars! But I’m still contemplating love. Everybody wants it, needs it, feels deserving of it, but what is it, exactly? You’ve probably read quite a bit about love recently, but love never gets old and it never goes out of fashion. We’re fixated on the stuff! So here are just a few more musings on this big, puffy red subject.

Love is a wonderful feeling that radiates from a central point in your being, and whatever it touches experiences contentment, acceptance, and an inward smile for no traceable reason.

Love is a charged feeling often confused with lust, desire, passion, obsession and control. But it’s easy to differentiate love from these powerful, stormy emotions; they typically focus on one object alone. Love is expansive and inclusive at once, allowing for laser focus on one entity, as well as the space for that entity to breathe.

Love is a beautiful, often euphoric state of mind. If you’re feeling moony, confused, scared, apprehensive or in pain, that’s not love. It’s something else. Like confusion, apprehension, hurt, and other things associated with, but definitely not, love.

Love is capable of overcoming hatred, but not fear, ignorance, institutionalized racism, or religious dogma. That takes education, patience and a good criminal justice system.

Love is not available for purchase, although you can receive it, and give it away for free.

Love can be lost, but only if you don’t know where to look for it. Strong hint: love is not and will never be in the person who left you. It may sound clichéd but it’s true: love exists inside you; it becomes activated when you meet someone whose heart recognizes yours. If that person leaves, the love still remains; they don’t get to take it away. Teaming up with a life mate is fantastic. But if doubt, despair or loneliness eclipses the love, another heart will never be able to discover yours.

Love is not blind. It sees everything. It just looks the other way when the crimes of imperfection, lack of resources, slovenliness, etc., exist in manageable doses.

Love is a thing, in every sense of the word. It may not have a shape, but it has weight, purpose and impact (it’s also very trendy). If you cannot help a person in need, send them love. It will make you both feel better. And trendy. (Especially you, the sender).

Love is not flighty, temperamental, judgmental or narcissistic. Remember that like attracts like, and love is no different.

Love is not commitment-averse. Love is totally committed to love.

Love is capable of inciting hallucinations; it can be quirky that way. So, if you see moonlight in her gaze and stardust in her hair, it means you’re in love; or you could be high on drugs. So, do invest in a reality check before proposing she spend the rest of her days with you in that lustrous river of life, sparkling like diamonds before you.

Love is always the same. Contrary to popular belief, there is no such thing as romantic love, brotherly/sisterly love, parental love, friend love, God’s love. Love is love. The color of love seems to change depending on our sentiments, baggage and preconceptions–Red!! Blue ☹–but love has no color. We’ve also decided that love is elusive, complicated and multi-layered. Love is none of those things. It is its own magnificent self, ever present, radiating its awesome invitation to come right in and bask in its glow; in other words, to feel good. Relationships come and go, as do people, jobs, money, houses and everything else that we can see and touch. Love is constant.

And, can someone please remind me that I said all of the above next time The Trickster drops in for a visit at my place? Thank you. I love you.

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